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[brandingproblem]

Clint Barton

hawkeyethearcherguy

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audio; un: eleven

[savingthrows]

Clint, do you copy?

[ She sounds excited. ]

I want to tell you news.

Over.

[brandingproblem]

[Oh no, she's still doing it over the phone, too.] You can talk like normal, El. Like a conversation face to face. You don't have to say over at the end. Unless you want to.

[It's tempting to do the same, to be funny, except she would take that bit literally, and he doesn't want to confuse her.]

What's the news?

un: iamironman

[ironypoisoned]

Hi. Can I ask you a value-neutral, judgement-free question?

[ Tony fiddles with his new pen between his fingers for a few seconds before sending: ]

Open marriage, or what happens with the fairies stays with the fairies?

[brandingproblem]

[Hey, what the fuck is this? Clint squints at the text, trying to parse what it is Tony's after here. So, might as well go the obvious way.]

As far as come ons go, that's definitely not your worst material. But I was hoping you'd at least bring you B game. Not even asking for A game here.

un: iamironman

[ironypoisoned]

[ It's been a week, and Tony's fangs aren't exactly going away as he was hoping they would once Narciso had been reconstituted. So he starts thinking of other possible reasons why he's been gifted with- No, no no. He's not going to start thinking of this like the local weirdos. No way. ]

Can I ask you a potentially stupid question?

[ He doesn't wait for the no before sending: ] Do you have fangs by any chance?
Because I think sleeping with His Royal Twinkiness got me fangs. [ Don't even mention the tongue. ]

[brandingproblem]

No I do not have fangs. [What a horrifying thought that he is vaguely aware Tony is dealing with.]

I don't feel like anything's changed with me physically, if you think he fucked magic into you.

[WHICH IS ALSO A HORRIFYING THOUGHT that keeps him up sometimes (and he'll find out about that) (at some point) (just not yet)]

un: alibaba | shortly after akechi's birthday

[unseensmiter]

hey roomie
i know you climbed out the window to do whatever you do when you climb out the window
but!
i need a (small) favor

Re: un: alibaba | shortly after akechi's birthday

[brandingproblem]

I sometimes even use actual doors. What do you need?

text; un: romanoff

[volgas]

I don't know if you've seen, but our newest resident is none other than Thanos himself.

[And look, she saw what he did after the king turned himself into mini versions of himself. Part of it is knowing that even if he's from some time after, she still remembers Ronan.

And then there's the other fact that despite being told that that what she did was worth it, that they reversed what he did, still seeing his face does bring out more that she would never say to Thanos himself, but that does shake her. She would make that same sacrifice again if she had to, a million times, if it meant the same outcome, but even just placing a moment of doubt in her head after the conversation she had with Tony of the mere chance of going home?

Well Nat's a little more shaken up than she would admit to anyone but Clint.]

[brandingproblem]

Yeah thanks I hate it. Can we just let him decimate them and the rest of us go home now?

[Clint's avoiding the whole thing. He's going to try. He's already gotten into an argument with Tony about Tony thinking he can talk his way out/through/around this to get their causes temporarily aligned.

There's a well of patience and capacity for forgiveness, an understanding that everyone deserves a second chance, that Clint has within him. An ability to let grudges fall away before they get to solidify.

He's pretty sure none of that extends to the guy that made five years of his life hell and made him lose his best friend. So sue him if he's a little upset about this development.]

text; un: eleven

[savingthrows]

do you want waffles

[ Are you okay?

I'm sorry I've been quiet.

I miss you.

So. Yeah. She asks if he wants waffles, instead. ]

[brandingproblem]

[It's out of the blue. And he knows she can make waffles. She'd only been bugging Tony about it weeks ago. So. He's going to take this as a sign that maybe something's wrong, or maybe she's feeling something Big, or maybe she just feels bad that she hasn't reached out.

Hey, neither has he. They're all busy and stupid here. And she should try to make nice with people more her own age, maybe.]

There is never a bad time for waffles. [and he will stand by that statement]

un: iamironman

[ironypoisoned]

Hi. I'm an asshole.

[brandingproblem]

I'm shocked. I'm making a shocked face right now. This is earth shattering information.
I am a shocked pikachu .jpg

What'd you do now?

un: alibaba

[unseensmiter]

two questions

1) would you teach a robot sign language?
he can't talk and you're the expert

and this one is way more important
dare i say... super important
2) do you want the super soldier mountain dew?
because your idiot friend thinks you definitely don't even though it TOTALLY saved him when i shot him (accidentally...) which seems completely unfair!!!
sentai logic dictates you ALL have to be evenly matched!!!!!!

[brandingproblem]

I'm not an expert. I barely speak it at all. I'm not sure I'm qualified to teach it, but I already agreed to teach what I know to someone else, so fuck me I guess.

There is no super serum here. Nobody can recreate it. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SHOT HIM

action, delivery

[restitui]

[ One day in early August, Clint will find a small bundle outside of his dormitory door - if he opens it there's a note: For protection. One use each. No promises. Miss Romanoff wanted to see if something could work, maybe if you tied it to an arrow? - William. Inside the bundle is a handful of wooden pieces with a rune drawn on them. One of them does have a small hole in it where string could be threaded through to be worn, if wanted. ]

voice; un: romanoff

[volgas]

Hey—- [Not a check in, but this is totally a check in. She sounds mildly bothered, but keeping her tone in check.]

You get any new surprises lately?

text

[brandingproblem]

[The unfortunate thing is that he kind of wishes he did get any new surprises lately. His voice still hasn't healed--or hasn't returned, or hasn't worked yet. He feels like the only recent surprise he's gotten has been Tony apologizing for misunderstanding the entire Narciso situation. Is that good or bad? Hard to say.]

I'm going to go ahead and assume this means you did.
What happened?

audio | un: variant

[sakna]

[ well, it's "leah's" voice this time, but.. you know. it's obviously recognizable for at least one particular version of clint. ]

Are you.. still the Clint that I spoke with earlier this week..? [ a slightly embarrassed pause. ] If so, would you like to have dinner with me?

.. If you're not, kindly ignore this.

[brandingproblem]

Oh. Uh. [Wow, first Loki and now Leah? That's fun. That doesn't give him a pang in his chest or anything.] Dinner? Are you sure?

un: alibaba | sometime before the 6th for no reason at all whatsoever

[unseensmiter]

hey

don't freak out
because nothing's going to happen
alright?
but in case something DOES happen...
i'm really, really glad i got to have you as a roommate

you don't get to know which one he is atm bc neither do I

[brandingproblem]

You know that means there's something going on that assumes the possibility of something happening

un: crafcrazy17, text ; if he's still au'd than the 15th

[restitui]

do you have a moment?

[brandingproblem]

I didn't do it, unless Natasha said I did it, then it was probably me yeah.
What do you need?

text | un: CapRogers

[vintagecaptain]

Can we meet in our spot?

un: iamironman

[ironypoisoned]

Hello

[ Mmm too serious. ]

Hey,

[ Mmmmm too casual. ]

Hi.

[ The period makes it seem like he's mad. ]

Look, okay,

[ Still no. ]

Clint, I

[ Nope. ]

You are the absolute LAST person I wanna talk to right now

[ Too honest. ]

I know I am DEFINITELY the last pers

[ Too presumptive.

Okay, none of those are it. Delete everything. ]

Natasha needs help with a thing.

[ There. That's... Safe. And normal. ]

Trying to convert the Bites' batteries to something, y'know, ~magical~ and I need someone with electric powers to charge the crystals.
So with Thor gone and all...
Can I pretty pretty please borrow your tattoos for a bit?

[brandingproblem]

[Look. He was not under any impression they were going to talk about it. The fact that there's any talking at all is a...pleasant? surprise?]

Don't know how much of a jolt you need but I can sure give it a try. I've picked up a shock ring, too. Might not be as powerful but apparently I've decided I'm doing double duty on the avenging front.